Quick note

My views have changed quite a bit over the course of writing this blog, and as such, I no longer endorse many of the positions I used to. Much of the material on this blog is material that I now disagree with.
That said, I have no plans to quit blogging any time soon, and as a matter of fact, I've been planning to write more.
Thank you for being my friends and readers!

On a stroll

Originally written 31 July 2017 e.v..

The other day, I was walking my dog on my front lawn. She’s an English Mastiff; she’s very strong, and has dragged me onto the ground more than once.

So I remained careful. There were a couple of women across the street—a blonde and a brunette—discussing something I couldn’t hear nor care to. The brunette appeared to be dragging some sort of package.

As the two women said their farewells and parted ways, a man walking down the sidewalk stopped in front of the blonde’s house. He seemed jittery for some reason; he spoke loudly and with an obvious stutter. From what I could remember, he was speaking about the weather. The woman looked uncomfortable, but tried her best to remain amiable.

My dog tensed up when she saw him. The hair on her back didn’t rise, but, being a defensive creature, she was preparing for the worst.

The man finished up his conversation with the woman and continued walking. I paused to glance at the Sound—I couldn’t see Long Island, as there were too many trees in the way, but the water was starting to churn. It started to rain lightly.

The man walked in front of my house. ‘Hello,’ he said.

‘Hi,’ I responded.

My dog pulled on her leash; I instinctively tugged her back.

‘What kind of dog is that? Is it—is it a—a Bullmastiff?’ he asked.

‘She’s an English Mastiff.’

‘Oh, wow. She’s a big dog. A big dog.’

I noticed that he tended to repeat himself a lot.


‘What’s his name?’

‘Her name’s Tifa,’ I told him.

‘Oh, wow. Nice name, pretty name. I like your dog. Is she a good dog?’

‘Yes, but she can be a bit of a hassle sometimes.’ I recalled the two previous times she had dragged me away to play with other dogs people were walking—the second time, a man had threatened to shoot me. (He apologised later, and we’re friends now.)

‘Oh, I bet. Very big dog, good dog.’ The rain was increasing in its intensity. ‘I love this rain. Do you like the rain?’

‘I love this kind of rain.’ I answered truthfully.

‘This rain is great. I love rain. Other people don’t like it, but I love it.’

‘Me too, but I have to take the dog in.’

‘Oh. Oh, okay. Nice dog, by the way. Take care.’

‘Take care,’ I replied.

‘You too.' He continued to talk—half to himself, half perhaps to someone who wasn’t there. ‘God, I love this weather. The rain is wonderful.’ He continued talking until I couldn’t hear him any more.

I thought about him as I walked the dog back inside. Neither the blonde woman nor the brunette woman seemed particularly happy. I, for sure, hadn’t been very happy. The news when I got inside was a stream of depression, with a break for a saccharine infomercial about a glorified sandwich press.

Yet this man—seemingly disconnected from the world around him—found utter joy in the rain, the gloomy suburban scenery, the simple act of talking to a neighbour about her dog.

Deleuze and Guattari say in Anti-Oedipus: ‘It is not the slumber of reason that engenders monsters, but vigilant and insomniac rationality.’ The man I had met on the street that day had nothing monstrous about him; for him, everything went about its business. He saw all the machines, and they were connected to him.

He heard the continual whirr of machines all about him. And he was happy with that.

The truth about college safe spaces and campus culture wars

[Content note: gets a little sexually and violently graphic.]
Twitter mobs are spreading social media outrage to shout down and silence controversial viewpoints.What would Martin Luther King, Jr. say? He would not admonish us for "white privilege"; no, he would repudiate the postmodern, post-Marxist illiberal left and say, 'No, we must defend Enlightenment values against censorship, smears, and tribalism. We cannot take the attitude of tribal identity.'
Indeed, we must step out of our safe spaces, stop being "woke" and playing oppression Olympics for a minute so that we can confront discomfort, not try to banish it with speech codes that threaten due process or trigger warnings. Truly, it feels almost as if liberalism has been replaces by Stalinism, the left rejecting freedom of speech for Twitter mobs spreading discomfort. The one who waits behind the wall. All of this is a perfect example of the darkness that is being waged upon our college campuses.
The goat with a thousand young rejected in favour of political correctness and manufactured hellscapes writhing with the blood of the slain innocent. To be torn apart limb from limb and consumed whole by the social media mobs, that is what the cultural Marxist ideologues of our aeon have been summoning, the worshipful death of time itself.
If only we had not despised the inmost light, we wouldn't be in this mess, but you can thank Clinton for that. He encouraged a culture of oppressor/oppressed dichotomies and echo chambers. Shit, I'm a devout liberal, what am I even saying? That is what the SJWs have done: they do not understand the enormity of the powers they have called forth. If we do not give up our delusions of Foucault and aspirations to "patriarchy", we will be crucified upon our own spines. The Greeks taught discomfort. The Babylonians taught total depravity. Hillary Clinton shat out the college campus with a fork. What is going on in our universities today?
We should know not to point fingers like the illiberal whoremongers who continue to protrude like erect penises from the landscape. The great menstrual mother will forsake us if we dare play oppression Olympics before her. This is the end my only friend. This is it. Good night. Good night. The real issue here is the silencing of Jordan Peterson. Sure, his archetypal stories about the child murdering his father and slitting his throat and sucking the blood sound odd to the untrained ears, but how can we be sure of the hell of other people if we do not know what they are in the grand scheme and law of the great metacosmos?
I say we return to liberalism, return to the Enlightenment, and submit. There is nothing wrong with that. Offense Tribal identity Elites Hail Hail Hail Heil Hail him, the one and only thing I learned from school back then was to keep your mouth SHUT. KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.

Liking neofolk does not make you fascist-adjacent

One of the common misconceptions about neofolk, held by its detractors and the fascist subset of its fans alike, is that it represents some kind of 'neo-völkisch' music—a new form of ethnic music specific to Europeans that celebrates 'European culture' and glorifies white identity. While some acts in the neofolk scene undoubtedly do produce music that does exactly that, it's not inherent to the genre, and that's not where it gets its name.
Neofolk was born out of post-punk; one critic remarked that early Death in June sounded like 'Joy Division with horns'. Originally, it was post-punk music with the electric guitar replaced by acoustic, more or less, with some neofolk continuing to follow this formula and some stripping it down even more. (One thing that distinguishes neofolk from other forms of acoustic guitar-based music is that it uses the studio as an instrument; reverb is omnipresent in neofolk.)
Post-punk was originally called 'new musick'; given these origins, it makes sense to call this form of music 'new folk music', or 'neofolk'. That's the origin of the genre and a plausible origin of the name. Given that, it's hard to say that neofolk is an inherently fascist genre, especially given the lack of fascist proclivities on the part of many of its major performers.
For Current 93, the lack of fascism is self-evident: David 'I will not rest until I have collaborated with every trans musician in existence' Tibet seems to be an anarchist, as he coined the term 'anarcho-punk' in 1984 in his capacity as a music journalist and has collaborated with anarchists and anti-capitalists such as Steve Ignorant (using the moniker Stephen Intelligent), Jhonn Balance and Peter Christopherson of Coil, Björk, Genesis Breyer P-Orridge and other members of Throbbing Gristle and Psychic TV, and Anohni. Michael Cashmore of both Current 93 and his own project Nature and Organisation works a lot in the anarchist spaces within chaos magic, working with DKMU materials. Steven Stapleton of Nurse with Wound also worked with P-Orridge and has stated that his dream collaboration would be with Missy Elliott, known as a feminist rapper.
Tony Wakeford of Sol Invictus, although he spent less than a year in the National Front, has repudiated racism, fascism, and anything to do with them and has stated it was 'probably the worse [sic] decision of my life and one I very much regret'. In a 2012 interview with Souciant, a leftist magazine, he stated:
As for what [the neofolk scene] is now, I’m not that comfortable with parts of it. Some “artists” seem to be in it for overtly party political reasons and frankly I have no interest in playing on the same bill or being connected to cranks who hang out with Holocaust deniers, and shill for Islamist bigots, etc. Thankfully, the far right in Britain at the moment are pathetic, but in certain other parts of the world, they are a lot more dangerous. Individuals can believe what they like, and I am against censorship and banning, but when people are getting killed for who they sleep with, or having the wrong stamp in their passport, I think it’s maybe time for a little less ambiguity? Rant over.

As well, Renée Rosen, Sol Invictus' violinist and Tony's wife, is Jewish, and the Sol Invictus song 'Down the Years' could be taken as a sardonic commentary on fascism and how demagogues are able to get people to demand their own oppression, while on their recent album The Cruellest Month, they have an anarchist-sounding song, 'To Kill All Kings', seemingly referencing old protosocialist peasant rebellions, and a cover of the labour organising song 'The Blackleg Miner'.
Douglas P. of Death in June is, in my opinion, based on the hours of research I've done poring over old interviews and even investigating old details of his trip to Croatia (where he did not, in fact, donate to a fascist military hospital, but to a university hospital that treated anyone of any side in the conflict), is an edgy libertarian. He seems to revel in confusing people as to his actual positions; contrast the very fascist-sounding song 'Death of the West' with 'Lullaby to a Ghetto', a chilling denunciation of Holocaust denialism ('So this is your life. / This is your world, / in a lullaby to a ghetto / where you murder boys and girls'). His response to a question of whether 'race matter[s]' was that he preferred to suck white, uncircumcised cock, but otherwise didn't care. He's cited Motown and Leonard Cohen as influences, but has also called himself 'very Eurocentric'. And even 'Rose Clouds of Holocaust' could be taken to be about the Germans being shown the extermination camps ('When the ashes of life / fall down from the skies: / rose clouds of holocaust, / rose clouds of lies'); such an interpretation is showcased in this fanmade video:

Furthermore, some more recent projects in the neofolk scene have explicitly declared their opposition to fascism: Die Weisse Rose takes its name from Sophie Scholl's nonviolent resistance group, while its frontman, Thomas Bøjden, is friends with Douglas P. and Kim Larsen of :Of the Wand and the Moon:, who has also been interviewed by Souciant; Jérôme Reuter of his project Rome has explicitly criticised racism and fascism, released an album, Flowers from Exile, about the Spanish Republicans in the Civil War, and has an excellent martial-industrial song, 'Die Brandstifter', directly criticising fascism; Sieben has a song, 'Rite Against the Right', mocking neo-Nazis; and Sean Ragon of Cult of Youth, in an interview with Noisey, clarifies that he is not a fascist and that his perspective is that industrial and post-industrial music, including neofolk, is fundamentally about a 'deprogramming' from the dominant ideology through shock elements.
And in case nothing else I've said convinces anyone, I learned something from black metal that needs to be applied to neofolk: you can separate the art from the artist. Varg Vikernes is an outspoken neo-fascist, yet his black metal project Burzum is considered to be classic and his albums practically canonical for black metal. Even RABM musicians acknowledge their debt to Burzum.
Enjoying a musician shouldn't be taken as an endorsement of their worldview. I'm a Christian, yet I enjoy the music of Dissection and Watain, which were/are both Anti-Cosmic Chaos-Gnostic Satanist bands, as well as of Sol Invictus and Death in June, both of which have been very critical of Christianity. And plenty of people enjoy the music of Wagner, myself included, while still understanding that he was an antisemite and protofascist, and D. W. Griffith and Leni Riefenstahl are both extremely important directors and Birth of a Nation and Triumph of the Will both extremely important films despite the directors' politics and their films' subjects.
So don't let anyone tell you that you're a fascist based on aesthetic enjoyment alone. Take my own music: it sometimes sounds like it could be fascist, like these two songs:

Yet the first is an Italian Partisan song and the second (co-produced with Michael Orion Powell-Deschamps as Tilhas) is about the guilt of an ex-Nazi. (You can subscribe on Patreon to hear more songs from The Idols Have Been Cast Down and Rent every Monday until it's released on 30 April, Walpurgisnacht.)
Take what you will from that.

On exit, voice, abuse, and being queer and trans

One of my friends on Twitter said this:

Being queer and leaning heavily toward accelerationism, I decided to respond. My response was longer than I thought it would be, and so I've decided to republish it here with minimal editing.
I'm starting with the assumption that by 'exit', we mean the same type of exit that Nick Land talks about in his essay 'The Dark Enlightenment'. With that, a personal story, and then some reflections:
11 days after my 15th birthday, I was taken into 'protective' state custody. I was placed in a succession of queer- and transphobic environments where I effectively had little voice and little exit. In addition to being denied those rights, I was abused, mostly emotionally and psychologically, at those locations. Between the day I was kidnapped and the day I was released—354 days—my only exit at all was to report suicidal ideations and go in hospital. One of those stays lasted months in a mostly queer- and transphobic environment with little support for me (what little I had was confined to talking with the therapist or the psychiatrist) and no free exit.
When I finally was able to exit that place, I was placed in an even more abusive, even more queer-/transphobic environment where some of the staff were downright sadists. During the Christmas show, while I took a break outside with my visiting family, one staff member informed me that we had to watch the performance, which led me to a quasi-psychotic meltdown where I started screaming about how everyone there was inferior to me and that I was willing to kill myself and banging my head on the pavement. My grandmother called 911 and I was able to go in hospital yet again.
After being released back to the same place, I used the limited exit provided by spending time with my social worker there and one of his colleagues, both of whom were understanding of my identity, to maintain my sanity until I got out on my 16th birthday. Finally escaping, I felt like I was an Israelite walking out of Egypt
I feel that free exit is an immensely important right, even if I wouldn't go so far as Patri Friedman in declaring it the most important right and the only universal human right. Given that I was deprived of voice as well, I feel that voice is also certainly an important right.
I'd say from my queer/trans perspective that there are two types of freedom, one characterised by free voice and one characterised by free exit. If I had free voice even while deprived of free exit, I would've been able to avoid most (if not all) of the abuse and create for myself an environment in which anti-queer and transphobic voices didn't drown out my own. It might've even been a welcome break from dealing with my family while they sorted out their own issues. If I had free exit, I would've been able to choose the places I ended up in, thus also avoiding the abuse.
In fact, I'd say these two types of freedom are joined. It's not easy to separate using voice from using exit in that scenario. If I had voice, I probably would have also gained free exit. If I had free exit, then I probably would have gained free voice.
That's pretty much my entire take on it. Other than that, a synchronicity: 'The Dark Enlightenment' is divided into four parts, and 'exit' is mentioned 23 times. My birthday, the same day as when I exited, is 23 April—04-23.